Tagged with Dreams

seven years of the dreaming vegetable

we are late. having eaten artisanal food pantry rosemary bread, plucked salmon berries off the bushes, played in the nettle, stared with child like glee at the cleavers and chickweed. I don’t wish to leave, but we must go if we want to see them. we are late.

it’s been almost seven years, and we walk quietly into the cathedral room. listening to the flat drum, and the large taiko reverberate throughout. silver cranes on one side and gold on the other. their voices call through out Na Mu Myo Ho Ren Ge Kyo. daniel hands me the flat drum and lays down the pillow. I kneel with familiarity. I feel my body lean into this memory. I hear my voice become part of theirs. the drums and our voices rising into the rafters. seven years gone in seconds. my feet become numb. i shift. this hour.

Na Mu Myo Ho Ren Ge Kyo

we begin to read out of a book. sinji san reads first. a paragraph. gilberto san asks me to read. he does not recognize me. seven years. daniel tells him that he knows me. there is finally that surprised glimpse of recognition. sinji san immediately looks at me, and says that it can not be. i have not aged. seven years. we hug and look at each other with wonder. seven years gone.

sinji san cooks dinner. we drink green tea and talk to gilberto san about politics and activism. I vaguely remember the woman who felt so passionate about these ideas. she tries to rise out of these seven years. gilberto san asks me what i am working on. he knows i am a mother. i answer simply: herbalism. he understands this activism. he smiles at me. this is someone that i want to impress. he hears my voice that speaks softly of community. he knows this silent form of activism that settles into your everyday actions and becomes part of who you are; becomes part of everything you do. becomes your body in action, in walking, in voice, in living. being.

we laugh about jun-san stories. the nun who proclaims so boldly: “My name is Dangerous.” I laugh at the Bronx Monk who yells back, and tells Hard-core Environmental Cyclists to mind their own dam business.

i had forgotten what it was to be here.  i want to keep it.  i love seeing these three faces.  we eat together.  we talk about the fortune of our lives.  the world outside of this bubble is often times sad and horrific.  i hear the stories of activists hoping to make change.  i hear the failures, but there is hope.  they continue to walk.  gilberto san tells me about his next adventure.  going to mexico leaving the safety of this island.  bainbridge will not contain him.  he will push forward, and this is why i love these people.  they take risks.  they live with passion for those things that they believe in.  they are in my heart.  their chant has never left.  it has simply been silent, but it is within me.  waiting to come forward.

we eat together in silence.  it is getting dark, and we need to cycle home before the sun is gone.  i do not have lights on my bike.  gilberto san asks sinji san to sign a book for me.  he sits down and begins to brush the paper with beautiful calligraphy.  he finally turns towards me and shows me the page.  it is so gracefully writen: Na Mu Myo Ho Ren Ge Kyo and then there is my name moona san.  he has translated my name.  Moo Na  he has written two words beside the flowing characters: dream and vegitable (the spelling)

i am the dreaming vegetable.

i ride home thinking about my roots in the ground absorbing nutrients.  these roots that nourish and provide.  these roots digging deep, and sorting through the mysteries and beauty of life

through dreams.

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moona and the dream of flying

Call in your madness. Call in the death of the one that has built your limitations. Call in the fire of your passions, and live. For nothing is permanent. There will be a day when I can no longer hold you to my body. Please live as if these moments are fleeting, and nothing could keep you from flying.

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Resolutions: The Stars Told Me This Is So?

It’s been ages since I’ve sent out a New Years note, and I’ve wondered why.  It seems the last time I remember sending one out was before I had Ali.  Forgive me, if I end up seeming sappy or even strange.  I suppose I enjoy analyzing these sorts of things, and every so often it’s nice to have folks to peek in with me.  What better time than the New Year.  Recently, I had a funny experience.  One that in some ways made me want to cry, and in others, made me furious as a lion.  I am a Leo after all……Yes, I hope all of you are shaking your heads at the hilariousness of me using this line.  

I had a phone interview with a woman who essentially told me that I did not have the proper energy to be part of her community.  I was sending out negative vibes, and obviously I needed to come to terms with the negative spirit that had overtaken my life.  How she deducted this on the phone is beyond me, but it completely set me off.  

As I am currently thinking about going to Tucson for the next couple of months, it reminded me of a funny experience I had there many years ago in which two fairly crazy people (in my book) told me:  You are in love with me (both of them; even though I had a boyfriend), you are satan (one of them), the stars told them that this is so (both of them) 

I will tell you that I am not beyond believing that there are many things that I do not know about life, and that perhaps it is possible that there are negative energies in the world, and they can overtake people…..BUT…..rarely, do I believe the people who tell me this.  They do leave me feeling unsettled though……how foul!!!!!!   Which made me think of the second thing that happened in Tucson, and helped me deal with how strange that time was.  A gentleman walked up to me on the street one day and introduced himself.  He quite simply told me that he had been sent to tell me something, and this is what he said (as best as I can remember)  “Do not believe everything people say about you, and listen to your dreams; they will tell you everything you need to know.”  and then he just as simply walked away from me.  Sure, it might not floor most people, but it was exactly what I needed to hear at that moment…..it probably would have meant absolutely nothing if he had come to say this to me at another point in my life, and strangley enough I have had some life changing dreams since that talk.  Dreams unlike any I had ever had before.  Does it mean something?   Hell, if I know, but I sure do find it interesting. 

My resolution for 2011?……listen to my dreams, and live them…….as long as they are to my liking.  *smiles* 

 What are your resolutions? 

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